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Funny Quotes

I told you I'll be ready in FIVE minutes, stop calling me every half hour - Funny Quotes
Having you in my life made everything better - Love Quotes
The darkest nights produce the brightest stars - Motivational Quotes
A year from now you'll wish you started today - Work Quotes
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why - Mark Twain Quotes
When I first saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew - William Shakespeare Quotes
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken - Oscar Wilde Quotes
I like me a little bit more when i'm with you - Love Quotes
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Text Quotes
Bye bitch  (Funny Quotes) Step aside Monday, this is a job for coffee  (Funny Quotes) I miss you like an idiot misses the point  (Funny Quotes) The most exercise you get is running your mouth, jumping to conclusions, and pushing your luck  (Funny Quotes) Attitude. You know it when you see it  (Funny Quotes) Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now  (Funny Quotes) If you're uncomfortable around my dog, I'm happy to lock you in the other room when you come over  (Funny Quotes) You had one job  (Funny Quotes) If she says "do whatever you want", do NOT do whatever you want  (Funny Quotes) The Earth without art is just eh  (Funny Quotes) Don't cry over spilt milk, just lick it up instead  (Funny Quotes) Going to McDonald's to get a salad is like going to a brothel for a hug  (Funny Quotes) Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is  (Funny Quotes) The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it  (Funny Quotes) Sarcasm is the bodies natural defense against stupid  (Funny Quotes) My car runs on gas, not friendship. So pay up.  (Funny Quotes) I don't think you understand mom. I need lightup shoes so I can run faster  (Funny Quotes) Always be yourself unless you can be a unicorn. Then always be a unicorn  (Funny Quotes) Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?  (Funny Quotes) I'm not crazy, my mother had me tested  (Funny Quotes) Life is short, so smile while you still have teeth  (Funny Quotes) Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself  (Funny Quotes) An apple a day keeps the doctor away, especially if you aim for the head  (Funny Quotes) Found it! Another home for the dog  (Funny Quotes) So close, yet so far away  (Funny Quotes) A quiet man is a thinking man. A quiet woman is usually mad  (Funny Quotes) Every silver lining has a cloud  (Funny Quotes) Nutrition facts are useless, just show me how long I have to be at the gym if I eat this.  (Funny Quotes) My husband and I are doing a workshop. He works and I shop!  (Funny Quotes) It's funny how people have strong opinions on things they know nothing about  (Funny Quotes)
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