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Funny Quotes

Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is
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I told you I'll be ready in FIVE minutes, stop calling me every half hour
Money may not buy happiness, but it's better to cry in a Lamborghini
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Together is my favorite place to be
The darkest nights produce the brightest stars
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Dogs teach us a lot of things but none more important than to love unconditionally
I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure
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What a beautiful world it would be if people had hearts like dogs
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Friendship Quotes Love Quotes Life Quotes Funny Quotes Motivational Quotes Inspirational Quotes
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Text Quotes
We will always be best friends until we are old and senile. then we can be new friends  (Funny Quotes) I'll stop wearing black when they make a darker color  (Funny Quotes) "stalking" is such a strong word, I prefer "Intense research of an individual"  (Funny Quotes) See, it doesn't hurt. So, why does mommy always cry when she steps on it  (Funny Quotes) Your face when someone you hate is talking  (Funny Quotes) I am great in bed. I can sleep for days  (Funny Quotes) They keep saying the right person will come along, but I think mine got hit by a truck  (Funny Quotes) HOW TO SLEEP FASTER: Decorate your bedroom to look like a classroom  (Funny Quotes) If you don't want anyone to know it, don't do it  (Funny Quotes) Money may not buy happiness, but it's better to cry in a Lamborghini  (Funny Quotes) Young at heart. Slightly older in other places  (Funny Quotes) Don't try to win over the haters, you are not the jerk whisperer  (Funny Quotes) Always remember, it's better to arrive late than to arrive ugly  (Funny Quotes) Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy  (Funny Quotes) The only time a woman is helpless is when her nail polish is drying. Other than that, watch out  (Funny Quotes) I don't always bark at night  (Funny Quotes) Just because i'm awake at 8am doesn't mean i'm ready to do things  (Funny Quotes) I need a drink, a man, or a massage. Or a drunken massage by a man  (Funny Quotes) Some people just need a high-five, in the face, with a chair  (Funny Quotes) When all else fails take a nap  (Funny Quotes) Drink coffee to get the energy to drink more coffee  (Funny Quotes) If he truly loves me, he'll let me sleep  (Funny Quotes) Yoga. Vodka  (Funny Quotes) I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure  (Funny Quotes) "Username or Password incorrect." TELL ME WHICH ONE YOU SON OF A BITCH  (Funny Quotes) Chocolate is always a good idea  (Funny Quotes) Me  (Funny Quotes) If you're in a bad situation, don't worry it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry it'll change  (Funny Quotes) Men go shopping to buy what they need. Women go shopping to find out what they want  (Funny Quotes) If each day is a gift, I would like to know where I can return Mondays  (Funny Quotes)
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