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Woody Allen Quotes

Paranoia is knowing all the facts Picture Quote #1

80 percent of success is showing up Picture Quote #1

My brain: it’s my second favorite organ Picture Quote #1

Where did you go to finishing school? On a pirate ship? Picture Quote #1

I bought her this handkerchief... and I didn’t even know her size Picture Quote #1

... Years of insanity have made this guy crazy! Picture Quote #1

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That was the most fun I ever had without laughing Picture Quote #1

The heart wants what it wants. There’s no logic Picture Quote #1

I think crime pays. The hours are good and you travel a lot Picture Quote #1

I feel that life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable Picture Quote #1

Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night Picture Quote #1

He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian Picture Quote #1

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Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special Picture Quote #1

All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that Picture Quote #1

Should I marry W.? Not if she won’t tell me the other letters in her name Picture Quote #1

My grammy never gave gifts, you know. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks Picture Quote #1

If you pursue the other woman, it’s a losing situation and it’s not good for your relationship or your marriage. If your marriage is open and you’re allowed to, that’s no good either. There’s no way, really in the end, to be happy unless you get very lucky Picture Quote #1

I’m not afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens Picture Quote #1

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I’ve had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not Picture Quote #1

I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats. (On the KKK) Picture Quote #1

I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib Picture Quote #1

I’m not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy Picture Quote #1

Nothing like a little post-traumatic stress disorder to make your day complete Picture Quote #1

Life is hard for insects. And don’t think mice are having any fun either Picture Quote #1

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All the crap they tell you about... getting joy and having a kind of wisdom in your golden years - it’s all tripe Picture Quote #1

Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses? Picture Quote #1

The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more Picture Quote #1

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens Picture Quote #1

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank Picture Quote #1

When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Paranoia is knowing all the facts (Woody Allen Quotes) 80 percent of success is showing up (Woody Allen Quotes) My brain: it’s my second favorite organ (Woody Allen Quotes) Where did you go to finishing school? On a pirate ship? (Woody Allen Quotes) I bought her this handkerchief... and I didn’t even know her size (Woody Allen Quotes) ... Years of insanity have made this guy crazy! (Woody Allen Quotes) That was the most fun I ever had without laughing (Woody Allen Quotes) The heart wants what it wants. There’s no logic (Woody Allen Quotes) I think crime pays. The hours are good and you travel a lot (Woody Allen Quotes) I feel that life is divided up into the horrible and the miserable (Woody Allen Quotes) Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night (Woody Allen Quotes) He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian (Woody Allen Quotes) Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special (Woody Allen Quotes) All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that (Woody Allen Quotes) Should I marry W.? Not if she won’t tell me the other letters in her name (Woody Allen Quotes) My grammy never gave gifts, you know. She was too busy getting raped by Cossacks (Woody Allen Quotes) If you pursue the other woman, it’s a losing situation and it’s not good for your relationship or your marriage. If your marriage is open and you’re allowed to, that’s no good either. There’s no way, really in the end, to be happy unless you get very lucky (Woody Allen Quotes) I’m not afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens (Woody Allen Quotes) I’ve had bad luck in my two previous marriages. The first wife left me, and the second did not. (Woody Allen Quotes) I think you should defend to the death their right to march, and then go down and meet them with baseball bats. (On the KKK) (Woody Allen Quotes) I don’t think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib. (Woody Allen Quotes) I’m not a big believer in the sense of Jews having a monopoly on comedy (Woody Allen Quotes) Nothing like a little post-traumatic stress disorder to make your day complete (Woody Allen Quotes) Life is hard for insects. And don’t think mice are having any fun either. (Woody Allen Quotes) All the crap they tell you about... getting joy and having a kind of wisdom in your golden years - it’s all tripe. (Woody Allen Quotes) Man was made in God`s image. Do you really think God has red hair and glasses? (Woody Allen Quotes) The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more (Woody Allen Quotes) I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens (Woody Allen Quotes) If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank (Woody Allen Quotes) When we played softball, I'd steal second base, feel guilty and go back (Woody Allen Quotes)

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