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W C Fields Quotes

I have a poor memory for names; but I seldom remember a face Picture Quote #1

Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself Picture Quote #1

When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other Picture Quote #1

I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure Picture Quote #1

Where there is a will, there’s prosperity around the corner Picture Quote #1

Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually Picture Quote #1

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It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world Picture Quote #1

I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes? Picture Quote #1

I can do anything I want to do! Picture Quote #1

The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it Picture Quote #1

No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree Picture Quote #1

A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her Picture Quote #1

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Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places Picture Quote #1

Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch Picture Quote #1

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her Picture Quote #1

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then give up. There's no use in being a damn fool about it Picture Quote #1

[of Charlie chaplin:] the son of a bitch is a ballet dancer.... He's the best Cballet dancer that ever lived... And if I get a good chance I'll kill him with my bare hands Picture Quote #1

Remember, a dead fish can float down stream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream Picture Quote #1

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Women are like elephants to me; they're nice to look at but I wouldn't want to own one Picture Quote #1

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times Picture Quote #1

Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it Picture Quote #1

There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it Picture Quote #1

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money Picture Quote #1

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it Picture Quote #1

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The only thing a lawyer won’t question is the legitimacy of his mother Picture Quote #1

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water Picture Quote #1

I don’t know why I ever come in here. The flies get the best of everything Picture Quote #1

I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I have a poor memory for names; but I seldom remember a face (W C Fields Quotes) Trust everybody, but cut the cards yourself (W C Fields Quotes) When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other (W C Fields Quotes) I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure (W C Fields Quotes) Where there is a will, there’s prosperity around the corner (W C Fields Quotes) Some people are born losers; others acquire the knack gradually (W C Fields Quotes) It is impossible to find twelve fair men in all the world (W C Fields Quotes) I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes? (W C Fields Quotes) I can do anything I want to do! (W C Fields Quotes) The funniest thing a comedian can do is not do it (W C Fields Quotes) No doubt exists that all women are crazy; it’s only a question of degree (W C Fields Quotes) A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her (W C Fields Quotes) Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places (W C Fields Quotes) Set up another case bartender! The best thing for a case of nerves is a case of Scotch (W C Fields Quotes) A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her (W C Fields Quotes) If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then give up. There's no use in being a damn fool about it (W C Fields Quotes) [of Charlie chaplin:] the son of a bitch is a ballet dancer.... He's the best Cballet dancer that ever lived... And if I get a good chance I'll kill him with my bare hands (W C Fields Quotes) Remember, a dead fish can float down stream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream (W C Fields Quotes) Women are like elephants to me; they're nice to look at but I wouldn't want to own one (W C Fields Quotes) Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times (W C Fields Quotes) Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there's nothing exactly like it (W C Fields Quotes) There are only two real ways to get ahead today - sell liquor or drink it (W C Fields Quotes) A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money (W C Fields Quotes) I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it (W C Fields Quotes) The only thing a lawyer won’t question is the legitimacy of his mother (W C Fields Quotes) Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water (W C Fields Quotes) I don’t know why I ever come in here. The flies get the best of everything (W C Fields Quotes) I feel like a midget with muddy feet had been walking over my tongue all night (W C Fields Quotes)

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