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Demetri Martin Quotes

To me, comedy is a game Picture Quote #1

If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find Picture Quote #1

I like digital cameras, because they enable you to reminisce immediately Picture Quote #1

I went to law school. I found it interesting for the first three weeks Picture Quote #1

Relationships, like eyebrows, are better when there is space between them Picture Quote #1

I always try to just be honest... As opposed to artifice or manipulation Picture Quote #1

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I can move objects with my mind... if I use my hands! Picture Quote #1

I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that’s when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater Picture Quote #1

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door Picture Quote #1

Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away Picture Quote #1

I like to go to concerts because I love to see my favorite band through the phone of the asshole who’s standing in front of me Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

To me, comedy is a game (Demetri Martin Quotes) If I had a bookstore I would make all the mystery novels hard to find (Demetri Martin Quotes) I like digital cameras, because they enable you to reminisce immediately (Demetri Martin Quotes) I went to law school. I found it interesting for the first three weeks (Demetri Martin Quotes) Relationships, like eyebrows, are better when there is space between them (Demetri Martin Quotes) I always try to just be honest... As opposed to artifice or manipulation (Demetri Martin Quotes) I can move objects with my mind... if I use my hands! (Demetri Martin Quotes) I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that’s when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater (Demetri Martin Quotes) The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door (Demetri Martin Quotes) Stand up is really fun because if I think of a joke or a funny idea, then I can just go and tell some people and if they laugh, they laugh right away (Demetri Martin Quotes) I like to go to concerts because I love to see my favorite band through the phone of the asshole who’s standing in front of me (Demetri Martin Quotes)

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