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Funniest Quotes Ever

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why - Mark Twain Quotes
You had me at hello - Love Quotes
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results - Albert Einstein Quotes
A girl doesn't need anyone who doesn't need her - Marilyn Monroe Quotes
I like me a little bit more when i'm with you - Love Quotes
Money may not buy happiness, but it's better to cry in a Lamborghini - Funny Quotes
I told you I'll be ready in FIVE minutes, stop calling me every half hour - Funny Quotes
What a beautiful world it would be if people had hearts like dogs - Dog Quotes
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Text Quotes
Expectation. Reality  (Funniest Quotes Ever) You had one job  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Nailed it  (Funniest Quotes Ever) When all else fails take a nap  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Only dead fish go with the flow  (Funniest Quotes Ever) So close, yet so far away  (Funniest Quotes Ever) I have so much to do that I'm going to bed  (Funniest Quotes Ever) My wife and i were happy for 20 years. Then we met  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now  (Funniest Quotes Ever) You idiot! I’m sure you’re right, but why?  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Life is hard. It's harder if your stupid  (Funniest Quotes Ever) I do not fail. I succeed in finding out what does not work  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Oh, my God. He’s online. Can he see me?  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Is your drama going to have an intermission soon? I need to pee  (Funniest Quotes Ever) No one told him that he can breathe underwater  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Quick. My wife is coming!  (Funniest Quotes Ever) I Child-Proofed My House But They Still Get In  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Instagram is down, just describe your lunch to me  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Ohhh guuurl. That top... with those shoes?  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Me. Internet. Life goals  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Get well soon! I can only be nice for so long  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Boyfriend says “Excuse Me” to girl in club. “How is she??”  (Funniest Quotes Ever) It's simple, if it jiggles, it's fat  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Why fall in love when you can fall asleep  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Me before I get ready in the morning  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Chocolate makes your clothes shrink  (Funniest Quotes Ever) And that’s how karma works  (Funniest Quotes Ever) Me every Monday morning  (Funniest Quotes Ever) This is how I feel when people fight on Facebook  (Funniest Quotes Ever)
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