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Dave Barry Quotes

What a beautiful world it would be if people had hearts like dogs
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A girl doesn't need anyone who doesn't need her
When we first met, i had no idea you would be so important to me
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Having you in my life made everything better
You had me at hello
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The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary
The darkest nights produce the brightest stars
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The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why
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Friendship Quotes Love Quotes Life Quotes Funny Quotes Motivational Quotes Inspirational Quotes
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Text Quotes
You can only be young once. But you can always be immature  (Dave Barry Quotes) What I look forward to is continued immaturity followed by death  (Dave Barry Quotes) Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship  (Dave Barry Quotes) Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it  (Dave Barry Quotes) ‘Escargot’ is French for ‘fat crawling bag of phlegm’  (Dave Barry Quotes) The ultimate camping trip was the Lewis and Clark expedition  (Dave Barry Quotes) User, n. The word computer professionals use when they mean idiot  (Dave Barry Quotes) Nobody understands how hard it is, being a captain  (Dave Barry Quotes) Do not spit gum in the drinking fountains  (Dave Barry Quotes) Dinner Special - Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00  (Dave Barry Quotes) [There is] a breed of fashion models  (Dave Barry Quotes) Democracy: In which you say what you like and do what you’re told  (Dave Barry Quotes) Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie  (Dave Barry Quotes) Your friends love you anyway  (Dave Barry Quotes) Murphy’s golden rule: Whoever has the gold, makes the rules  (Dave Barry Quotes) Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face  (Dave Barry Quotes) Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting  (Dave Barry Quotes) Orangutan are very weird animals but they look very soulful  (Dave Barry Quotes) There are two kinds of people in this world, and I am one of them  (Dave Barry Quotes) Remember: What dad really wants is a nap. Really  (Dave Barry Quotes) Line printer paper is strongest at the perforations  (Dave Barry Quotes) Sign outside a country shop: We buy junk and sell antiques  (Dave Barry Quotes) For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord  (Dave Barry Quotes) Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others  (Dave Barry Quotes) Murphy’s golden rule: Whoever has the gold, makes the rules  (Dave Barry Quotes) Too many rocks in the mountains  (Dave Barry Quotes) Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands  (Dave Barry Quotes) If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?  (Dave Barry Quotes) Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege  (Dave Barry Quotes) There are no bad haircuts in cyberspace  (Dave Barry Quotes)
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