|

|

Advertisements

Jarod Kintz Quotes

I often wear camouflaged pants so when I walk I look like a floating torso. I love with the same air of mystery Picture Quote #1

My cup is full of air. I should empty it and fill it with love. Or coffee, as the two are synonymous to me Picture Quote #1

I want to conserve energy expenditure by reducing our air intake. Save lives by saving your I love yous and holding your breath for the duration of your relationship Picture Quote #1

I think a rocking chair should at least be able to play air guitar before you call it rocking Picture Quote #1

If you bring bring the karaoke machine, I’ll bring the air guitar. Also, if you bring two brings, like I just brought, we can have a Redundancy Party Picture Quote #1

The naked truth is anything but naked. But it will be soon enough, if I keep giving it alcohol Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

A band should be more famous than an individual, because all else being equal, the band has more mothers and fathers to lend support Picture Quote #1

Love is the hero of all emotions. My love for you is a superhero, and it looks great hidden behind a mask Picture Quote #1

I realize all guys have thorns. But I am a rose, and she chose a cactus over me. I wish her luck with her dry, desert-like existence with him Picture Quote #1

She wants to teach me to dance, but how do you instruct water to flow? I’m so fluid all you can do is swim in my moves and drink my essence Picture Quote #1

Earlier tonight somebody robbed an all-you-can-eat buffet. Suspect at large Picture Quote #1

When someone insults me, I simply shut down. Then I open back up at 9 am the next morning Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

Love is the most amazing feeling in the world. Let me double check. Yep, love is a feeling Picture Quote #1

Awards represent achievement, and to an extent they show more about who you are as a person than the personal items you picked out and purchased, because they show desire, ambition, goals, and accomplishment Picture Quote #1

A zebra has stripes, the American flag has stripes, and I have an erection. Coincidence? Picture Quote #1

Love is an empty bottle, and it makes my heart thirsty thinking how fast I chugged it Picture Quote #1

Empty pockets full of empty packets of hot sauce remind me of the love I have for her. My heart burns with desire. My mouth also burns Picture Quote #1

Being an only child makes me the oldest child and the youngest child. And the middle child Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

I would rather build a relationship than a wall. Can you pass me another brick? Picture Quote #1

I feel like something warm. Apple pie, with two slices of bread and roast beef, covered in a winter coat Picture Quote #1

I thought I was eating a candy bar, but it turned out to be a yummy burrito. I was both disappointed and appointed at the same time Picture Quote #1

If anybody can appreciate fine music, it’s me. I mean who else can hit multiple octaves with their armpits~? Picture Quote #1

Let us embrace each other like we have the arms of two chairs. Let us dance like our legs are those of a table. We should do dinner sometime Picture Quote #1

The cool thing about vests is they have no sleeves. I guess their target market is people with no arms. Raise your hand if you disagree Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

Under the guise of being nice guys, the central bankers have done to the people what no army in history has been evil enough to do Picture Quote #1

The world is my canvas, and my ponytail is my paintbrush. Helen Keller probably had a ponytail too, though my art has more vision. Barely Picture Quote #1

I watched a bowl of fruit on the table remain motionless. Just another example of life imitating art Picture Quote #1

If science took my IQ and spread it evenly among the world’s population, like mental mayonnaise, we’d have more art, less war, and higher cholesterol Picture Quote #1

During the murder investigation, the cop said, I only have one question for you. Before she could ask it, I replied, Yes, I will marry you Picture Quote #1

I am the coffee, and God is The Barista. Through me, he may awaken your soul. But the coffee knows not what flows through the mind of The Barista Picture Quote #1

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 - 14

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Advertisements

Text Quotes

I often wear camouflaged pants so when I walk I look like a floating torso. I love with the same air of mystery. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) My cup is full of air. I should empty it and fill it with love. Or coffee, as the two are synonymous to me. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I want to conserve energy expenditure by reducing our air intake. Save lives by saving your I love yous and holding your breath for the duration of your relationship. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I think a rocking chair should at least be able to play air guitar before you call it rocking (Jarod Kintz Quotes) If you bring bring the karaoke machine, I’ll bring the air guitar. Also, if you bring two brings, like I just brought, we can have a Redundancy Party. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) The naked truth is anything but naked. But it will be soon enough, if I keep giving it alcohol. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A band should be more famous than an individual, because all else being equal, the band has more mothers and fathers to lend support. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Love is the hero of all emotions. My love for you is a superhero, and it looks great hidden behind a mask. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I realize all guys have thorns. But I am a rose, and she chose a cactus over me. I wish her luck with her dry, desert-like existence with him. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) She wants to teach me to dance, but how do you instruct water to flow? I’m so fluid all you can do is swim in my moves and drink my essence. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Earlier tonight somebody robbed an all-you-can-eat buffet. Suspect at large. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) When someone insults me, I simply shut down. Then I open back up at 9 am the next morning. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Love is the most amazing feeling in the world. Let me double check. Yep, love is a feeling. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Awards represent achievement, and to an extent they show more about who you are as a person than the personal items you picked out and purchased, because they show desire, ambition, goals, and accomplishment. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) A zebra has stripes, the American flag has stripes, and I have an erection. Coincidence? (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Love is an empty bottle, and it makes my heart thirsty thinking how fast I chugged it (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Empty pockets full of empty packets of hot sauce remind me of the love I have for her. My heart burns with desire. My mouth also burns. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Being an only child makes me the oldest child and the youngest child. And the middle child. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I would rather build a relationship than a wall. Can you pass me another brick? (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I feel like something warm. Apple pie, with two slices of bread and roast beef, covered in a winter coat. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I thought I was eating a candy bar, but it turned out to be a yummy burrito. I was both disappointed and appointed at the same time. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) If anybody can appreciate fine music, it’s me. I mean who else can hit multiple octaves with their armpits~? (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Let us embrace each other like we have the arms of two chairs. Let us dance like our legs are those of a table. We should do dinner sometime. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) The cool thing about vests is they have no sleeves. I guess their target market is people with no arms. Raise your hand if you disagree. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) Under the guise of being nice guys, the central bankers have done to the people what no army in history has been evil enough to do. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) The world is my canvas, and my ponytail is my paintbrush. Helen Keller probably had a ponytail too, though my art has more vision. Barely. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I watched a bowl of fruit on the table remain motionless. Just another example of life imitating art. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) If science took my IQ and spread it evenly among the world’s population, like mental mayonnaise, we’d have more art, less war, and higher cholesterol. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) During the murder investigation, the cop said, I only have one question for you. Before she could ask it, I replied, Yes, I will marry you. (Jarod Kintz Quotes) I am the coffee, and God is The Barista. Through me, he may awaken your soul. But the coffee knows not what flows through the mind of The Barista. (Jarod Kintz Quotes)

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 - 14