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Chris Rock Quotes

Most parts in comedy, they’re not really written for men. They’re written for, like, these boy-men Picture Quote #1

Women need food, water, and compliments That’s right. And an occasional pair of shoes Picture Quote #1

We got no wealthy black people. We got rich people. Shaq is rich. The guy who signs his checks is wealthy Picture Quote #1

A black man will be elected President of the United States. I’m sorry, that’s in the year 10,000 Picture Quote #1

WHEN YOU MEET SOMEBODY FOR THE FIRST TIME, YOU’RE NOT MEETING THEM. YOU’RE MEETING THEIR REPRESENTATIVE Picture Quote #1

Here’s the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it’s all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people were crazy. Now they’re not as crazy. To say that black people have made progress would be to say they deserve what happened to them before Picture Quote #1

When we first met, i had no idea you would be so important to me

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Be yourself; everyone else is already taken

So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he’s the first black person that is qualified to be president. That’s not black progress. That’s white progress Picture Quote #1

If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite Picture Quote #1

As far as guys who perform onstage, I love Chris Rock. I’m kind of jaded on everyone else Picture Quote #1

The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff Picture Quote #1

A lot of comics aren’t their on-screen personas; Chris Rock isn’t always ranting and raving. What I do is make myself this over-the-top character that people either find endearing or they think is a joke. Then I can do anything I want Picture Quote #1

I was influenced by a lot of stand-up comedians... Eddie Murphy back when he was doing ‘Raw.’ I watched that so many times as a kid, I can probably still quote the entire thing to this day. Chris Rock. Dave Chappelle. George Carlin. A lot of the guys who were sort of edgy for their time Picture Quote #1

A true friend is someone who accepts your past, supports your present and encourages your future

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The darkest nights produce the brightest stars

When you’re onstage with Chris Rock, anything can happen. He is one of the greatest comic geniuses we’ve ever seen Picture Quote #1

When people try to read between the lines - critics, they have a job. Their job is to make something bigger than it is Picture Quote #1

Black History Month is in the shortest month of the year, and the coldest-just in case we want to have a parade Picture Quote #1

Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof! Picture Quote #1

People are the same wherever you go. And if they weren’t, they wouldn’t laugh at the same s**t Picture Quote #1

My dad worked every day. I didn’t get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids - that’s what success is to me Picture Quote #1

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work

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When I first saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew

Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people Picture Quote #1

I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared Picture Quote #1

The Academy Awards ceremony is designed to be without irony, but Chris Rock supplied it anyway with filmed movie-theater interviews with black men and women who had never heard of the movies nominated for Best Picture Picture Quote #1

My thing is you’re only as good as the people you work with. I’ve been blessed to work with the Wayanses and Eddie Murphy and Adam Sandler and Chris Rock, and it makes you better Picture Quote #1

I like ‘The Usual Suspects’. Great film. I also like ‘Scarface’, films like that. Lots of gangster films. I really like watching all kinds of films, dramas, romance. I’ll watch comedies. I like Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Denzel Washington, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle. I’d like to meet them Picture Quote #1

I like talking about subjects that aren’t funny in the first place and making them funny. So anything down and depressing is something I’ll talk about Picture Quote #1

Money may not buy happiness, but it's better to cry in a Lamborghini

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And then you meet one person and your life changes forever

You’d got a baseball game, or a football game, basketball game, USA! USA! USA! Hey, calm down! Got a little German on it, don’t you think? Picture Quote #1

My mother is the kind of woman you don’t want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons Picture Quote #1

The thing that surprised me the most is just how much money women that weren’t rich were paying for their hair. When you’re in a beauty parlor in Harlem next to abandoned buildings and somebody’s paying five grand for a weave, that’s a bit much Picture Quote #1

Is America ready for a black president? Well, I say we just had a retarded one. When did being black become a bigger deterrent than being retarded? Picture Quote #1

I love seeing black people do normal things, being judged as normal people Picture Quote #1

Here’s what I knew about doing a play: I knew it would make me a better actor Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Most parts in comedy, they’re not really written for men. They’re written for, like, these boy-men (Chris Rock Quotes) Women need food, water, and compliments That’s right. And an occasional pair of shoes (Chris Rock Quotes) We got no wealthy black people. We got rich people. Shaq is rich. The guy who signs his checks is wealthy (Chris Rock Quotes) A black man will be elected President of the United States. I’m sorry, that’s in the year 10,000 (Chris Rock Quotes) WHEN YOU MEET SOMEBODY FOR THE FIRST TIME, YOU’RE NOT MEETING THEM. YOU’RE MEETING THEIR REPRESENTATIVE (Chris Rock Quotes) Here’s the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it’s all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people were crazy. Now they’re not as crazy. To say that black people have made progress would be to say they deserve what happened to them before (Chris Rock Quotes) So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he’s the first black person that is qualified to be president. That’s not black progress. That’s white progress (Chris Rock Quotes) If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the exact opposite (Chris Rock Quotes) As far as guys who perform onstage, I love Chris Rock. I’m kind of jaded on everyone else (Chris Rock Quotes) The most influential thing was the two Chris Rock specials that came out when I was in high school. I was obsessed with that stuff (Chris Rock Quotes) A lot of comics aren’t their on-screen personas; Chris Rock isn’t always ranting and raving. What I do is make myself this over-the-top character that people either find endearing or they think is a joke. Then I can do anything I want (Chris Rock Quotes) I was influenced by a lot of stand-up comedians... Eddie Murphy back when he was doing ‘Raw.’ I watched that so many times as a kid, I can probably still quote the entire thing to this day. Chris Rock. Dave Chappelle. George Carlin. A lot of the guys who were sort of edgy for their time (Chris Rock Quotes) When you’re onstage with Chris Rock, anything can happen. He is one of the greatest comic geniuses we’ve ever seen (Chris Rock Quotes) When people try to read between the lines - critics, they have a job. Their job is to make something bigger than it is (Chris Rock Quotes) Black History Month is in the shortest month of the year, and the coldest-just in case we want to have a parade (Chris Rock Quotes) Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof! (Chris Rock Quotes) People are the same wherever you go. And if they weren’t, they wouldn’t laugh at the same s**t (Chris Rock Quotes) My dad worked every day. I didn’t get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids - that’s what success is to me (Chris Rock Quotes) Black people have been qualified to be president for hundreds of years. George Washington Carver could have been president. I could go on with a list of black men that were qualified to be the president of the United States. So the Obama victory is progress for white people (Chris Rock Quotes) I just thought everybody lived around abandoned buildings and crack-heads, ... I lived in the ghetto until I was like 19. I came to Los Angeles, stayed at hotels and stuff. When I got back and I saw what my neighborhood looked like, I started getting scared (Chris Rock Quotes) The Academy Awards ceremony is designed to be without irony, but Chris Rock supplied it anyway with filmed movie-theater interviews with black men and women who had never heard of the movies nominated for Best Picture (Chris Rock Quotes) My thing is you’re only as good as the people you work with. I’ve been blessed to work with the Wayanses and Eddie Murphy and Adam Sandler and Chris Rock, and it makes you better. (Chris Rock Quotes) I like ‘The Usual Suspects’. Great film. I also like ‘Scarface’, films like that. Lots of gangster films. I really like watching all kinds of films, dramas, romance. I’ll watch comedies. I like Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Denzel Washington, Chris Rock, Dave Chappelle. I’d like to meet them. (Chris Rock Quotes) I like talking about subjects that aren’t funny in the first place and making them funny. So anything down and depressing is something I’ll talk about. (Chris Rock Quotes) You’d got a baseball game, or a football game, basketball game, USA! USA! USA! Hey, calm down! Got a little German on it, don’t you think? (Chris Rock Quotes) My mother is the kind of woman you don’t want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for coupons. (Chris Rock Quotes) The thing that surprised me the most is just how much money women that weren’t rich were paying for their hair. When you’re in a beauty parlor in Harlem next to abandoned buildings and somebody’s paying five grand for a weave, that’s a bit much. (Chris Rock Quotes) Is America ready for a black president? Well, I say we just had a retarded one. When did being black become a bigger deterrent than being retarded? (Chris Rock Quotes) I love seeing black people do normal things, being judged as normal people (Chris Rock Quotes) Here’s what I knew about doing a play: I knew it would make me a better actor (Chris Rock Quotes)

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