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Emo Philips Quotes

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps Picture Quote #1

I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me Picture Quote #1

I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him Picture Quote #1

I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy Picture Quote #1

Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories? Picture Quote #1

You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back Picture Quote #1

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My parents were very protective. I couldn’t even cross the street without them getting all excited, and placing bets Picture Quote #1

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this Picture Quote #1

My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes Picture Quote #1

Lord please break the laws of the universe for my convenience. Amen Picture Quote #1

I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code Picture Quote #1

Don’t wear fur! Did you know, a single fur coat takes fifteen trees, just for the protest signs? Picture Quote #1

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I like to play chess with bald men in the park although it’s hard to find 32 of them Picture Quote #1

My girlfriend always giggles during sex. No matter what she’s reading Picture Quote #1

I always wanted a beautiful loving wife and she always wanted to be a citizen Picture Quote #1

I tried body surfing once, but how often do you find a corpse? Picture Quote #1

Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, don’t do it! Picture Quote #1

Ambiguity is the devil’s volleyball Picture Quote #1

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I’m not a fatalist; even if I were, what could I do about it? Picture Quote #1

So I’m at the wailing wall, standing there like a moron, with my harpoon Picture Quote #1

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don’t know what he looks like Picture Quote #1

My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn’t have sex quite so often Picture Quote #1

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Some mornings, it’s just not worth chewing through the leather straps (Emo Philips Quotes) I got some new underwear the other day. Well, new to me (Emo Philips Quotes) I once had a large gay following, but I ducked into an alleyway and lost him (Emo Philips Quotes) I was at a bar nursing a beer. My nipple was getting quite soggy (Emo Philips Quotes) Whatever happened to the good ole days, when children worked in factories? (Emo Philips Quotes) You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back (Emo Philips Quotes) My parents were very protective. I couldn’t even cross the street without them getting all excited, and placing bets (Emo Philips Quotes) I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this (Emo Philips Quotes) My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes (Emo Philips Quotes) Lord please break the laws of the universe for my convenience. Amen (Emo Philips Quotes) I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code (Emo Philips Quotes) Don’t wear fur! Did you know, a single fur coat takes fifteen trees, just for the protest signs? (Emo Philips Quotes) I like to play chess with bald men in the park although it’s hard to find 32 of them (Emo Philips Quotes) My girlfriend always giggles during sex. No matter what she’s reading (Emo Philips Quotes) I always wanted a beautiful loving wife and she always wanted to be a citizen (Emo Philips Quotes) I tried body surfing once, but how often do you find a corpse? (Emo Philips Quotes) Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, don’t do it! (Emo Philips Quotes) Ambiguity is the devil’s volleyball (Emo Philips Quotes) I’m not a fatalist; even if I were, what could I do about it? (Emo Philips Quotes) So I’m at the wailing wall, standing there like a moron, with my harpoon (Emo Philips Quotes) I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don’t know what he looks like (Emo Philips Quotes) My mother was like a sister to me, only we didn’t have sex quite so often (Emo Philips Quotes) A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing (Emo Philips Quotes)

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