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Samantha Bee Quotes

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why
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I told you I'll be ready in FIVE minutes, stop calling me every half hour
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken
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I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work
Having you in my life made everything better
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You don't need someone to complete you. You only need someone to accept you completely
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results
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A true friend is someone who accepts your past, supports your present and encourages your future
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Text Quotes
I was totally unknown in the television and film industry in Canada  (Samantha Bee Quotes) It’s fun to be surrounded by people that you love  (Samantha Bee Quotes) It’s not every day people fly you to New York for auditions  (Samantha Bee Quotes) Don’t judge me. I made a lot of money.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) A lot of funny stuff happens in Canada  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I get maximum satisfaction out of buying children’s clothes online  (Samantha Bee Quotes) The best part about poker is there’s no down side  (Samantha Bee Quotes) A lot of comedy is really DIY. You’re kind of doing it yourself.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) It’s not every day people fly you to New York for auditions  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I’m shy, but I’m not clinically shy. I don’t have social anxiety disorder or anything like that. I more have a gentle shyness. Like, I have a little trouble mingling at parties.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) Last year people won more than one billion dollars playing poker. And casinos made twenty-seven billion just by being around those people  (Samantha Bee Quotes) If I could live in New York the rest of my life, I absolutely would, but it’s also prohibitively expensive and you have to be working. New York is a lot nicer when you have a job  (Samantha Bee Quotes) My apartment is the equivalent of one room in my Toronto home. Now I understand why New Yorkers are on the streets at all hours. People don’t want to stay inside for fear they’ll go crazy  (Samantha Bee Quotes) Christmas: It’s the only religious holiday that’s also a federal holiday. That way, Christians can go to their services, and everyone else can sit at home and reflect on the true meaning of the separation of church and state  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I grew up an only child, so I was so much more adult. My eldest daughter is 10, and I was so much more of an adult than she is. She just doesn’t care for the real world. She’s not interested.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I’m good at asking other people questions, but I’m not really good at answering questions  (Samantha Bee Quotes) It’s like you can’t even go on the radio anymore and condemn a whole subset of people to hell without getting some blowback.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I hate birthdays. I thought that I only hated my own birthday, and then I realized that I hate my children’s birthdays too.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) President Trump - God forbid - the country will be okay, I promise. I don’t know exactly what the country will look like, but we will survive it.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) There’s always going to be someone who hates you. There’s always going to be people who love you. It’s a risk in either direction.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I believe in breakfast. It’s the one meal that my kids usually eat without a fuss, so that’s huge. As for myself, I can’t function without it, and I see it as a great way to get some healthy greens in, some coffee, and on a good day, maybe even some news of the world via the newspaper.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) Everybody is agreeing so tersely. I just had a flashback to the month before my parents finally admitted they were getting a divorce.  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I learn something in the interviews from time to time  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I think NASCAR’s coming to Canada now so it’ll take on a whole new relevance. Be afraid  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I think the show does better with newsmakers and politicians than it does with actors  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I get maximum satisfaction out of buying children’s clothes online  (Samantha Bee Quotes) The best part about poker is there’s no down side  (Samantha Bee Quotes) You have to be willing to ask questions that almost no one else would ask  (Samantha Bee Quotes) Sex with my first boyfriend was a little bit like learning how to put in a tampon, but only half as enjoyable!  (Samantha Bee Quotes) I don’t think the show would be funny to you if you didn’t already have a base of information  (Samantha Bee Quotes)
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