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Russell Baker Quotes
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Text Quotes
I frankly admit to not knowing who I am. This is why I refuse to buy clothes that will tell people who I want them to think I am (Russell Baker Quotes)
The young cult of sociology, needing a language, invented one. There are many dead languages, but the sociologists' is the only language that was dead at birth (Russell Baker Quotes)
The old notion that brevity is the essence of wit has succumbed to the modern idea that tedium is the essence of quality (Russell Baker Quotes)
Life seemed to be an educator's practical joke in which you spent the first half learning and the second half learning that everything you learned in the first half was wrong (Russell Baker Quotes)
The biographer's problem is that he never knows enough. The autobiographer's problem is that he knows too much (Russell Baker Quotes)
New York is the only city in the world where you can get run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian (Russell Baker Quotes)
There is a growing literature about the multitude of journalism's problems, but most of it is concerned with the editorial side of the business, possibly because most people competent to write about journalism are not comfortable writing about finance (Russell Baker Quotes)
When it comes to cars, only two varieties of people are possible - cowards and fools (Russell Baker Quotes)
The worst thing about being a tourist is having other tourists recognize you as a tourist (Russell Baker Quotes)
So there he is at last. Man on the moon. The poor magnificent bungler! He can't even get to the office without undergoing the agonies of the damned, but give him a little metal, a few chemicals, some wire and twenty or thirty billion dollars and vroom! There he is, up on a rock a quarter of a million miles up in the sky (Russell Baker Quotes)
The best thing about being President is that it gets you out of American life. I don't know what the theory is behind this, but it is a fact. The first thing we do with a President is shunt him off to a siding where nothing American can ever happen to him (Russell Baker Quotes)
We watched some of the movie. It was shocking. Sex is apparently hard labor. Various persons supported crushing weights in agonizing positions for what seemed like endless blocks of time. Exhausted men grunted and toiled like movers trying to get a refrigerator into a fifth floor walk-up (Russell Baker Quotes)
Urban people, of course, are terribly scared nowadays. They may yearn for society, but it is risky to go around talking to strangers, for a lot of reasons, one being that people are so accustomed not to have many human contacts that they are afraid they may find out they really prefer life that way (Russell Baker Quotes)
The Government cannot afford to have a country made up entirely of rich people, because rich people pay so little tax that the Government would quickly go bankrupt. This is why Government men always tell us that labor is man's noblest calling. Government needs labor to pay it's upkeep (Russell Baker Quotes)
There is no business like show business, Irving Berlin once proclaimed, and thirty years ago he may have been right, but not anymore. Nowadays almost every business is like show business, including politics, which has become more like show business than show business is (Russell Baker Quotes)
All politicians are humble, and seldom let you forget it. They go around the country boasting about their humility. They are proud of their humility. Many are downright arrogant about their humility and insist that it qualifies them to be President (Russell Baker Quotes)
Of all the people insistently expressing their mental vacuity, none has a better excuse for an empty head than the newspaperman: If he pauses to restock his brain, he invites onrushing headlines to trample him flat (Russell Baker Quotes)
The dirty work at political conventions is almost always done in the grim hours between midnight and dawn. Hangmen and politicians work best when the human spirit is at its lowest ebb (Russell Baker Quotes)
Skinny women don’t enjoy being told they’re skinny nowadays. They enjoy telling you how they got that way, as though starvation were an achievement (Russell Baker Quotes)
It is safest to shut up and pay, which is what I shall eventually do, though I shall hate having to sell the children (Russell Baker Quotes)
In writing, punctuation plays the role of body language. It helps readers hear you the way you want to be heard (Russell Baker Quotes)
Scientists have been struck by the fact that things that break down virtually never get lost, while things that get lost hardly ever break down (Russell Baker Quotes)
It’s good for the soul to hear yourself as others hear you, and next time maybe, just maybe, you will not talk so much, so loudly, so brilliantly, so charmingly, so utterly shamelessly foolishly (Russell Baker Quotes)
It’s always seemed odd to me that after a group of terrorists commits a vile and odious deed they rush messages to the public to claim credit for it (Russell Baker Quotes)
My natural instinct after doing something shameful is not to rush into the street boasting about it but to put on dark glasses and head for the next county, hoping nobody notices I’ve been in the neighborhood (Russell Baker Quotes)