|

|

Advertisements

Red Skelton Quotes

I don’t hate my enemies. After all, I made ‘em Picture Quote #1

I won’t mind dying if I can tell St. Peter a joke he hasn’t heard Picture Quote #1

Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce Picture Quote #1

Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places Picture Quote #1

All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner Picture Quote #1

I know my limit. I just keep passing out before I reach it Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations Picture Quote #1

I’m nuts and I know it. But so long as I make ‘em laugh, they ain’t going to lock me up Picture Quote #1

I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. ‘Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!’ she said. So I suggested the kitchen Picture Quote #1

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap Picture Quote #1

Today’s comics use four-letter words as a shortcut to thinking. They’re shooting for that big laugh and it becomes a panic thing, using four-letter words to shock people Picture Quote #1

I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first Picture Quote #1

If by chance some day you’re not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I’ve said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled Picture Quote #1

Bob Hope, Red Skelton, and Eddie Cantor... help us keep our balance Picture Quote #1

There are three signs of old age: loss of memory... I forget the other two Picture Quote #1

I don’t pick on politicians. They ain’t done nothin’ Picture Quote #1

I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime Picture Quote #1

God’s children and their happiness are my reasons for being Picture Quote #1

If by chance some day you’re not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I’ve said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled Picture Quote #1

Congress: Bingo with billions Picture Quote #1

I only come to life when there are people watching Picture Quote #1

I left home because I was hungry Picture Quote #1

Advertisements

I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy Picture Quote #1

No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds Picture Quote #1

Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations Picture Quote #1

Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness or misery. Too much care, therefore, cannot be taken in forming our principles Picture Quote #1

Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics Picture Quote #1

You know how to tell when you’re getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist Picture Quote #1

1 2

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

Advertisements

Text Quotes

I don’t hate my enemies. After all, I made ‘em (Red Skelton Quotes) I won’t mind dying if I can tell St. Peter a joke he hasn’t heard (Red Skelton Quotes) Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce (Red Skelton Quotes) Old age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places (Red Skelton Quotes) All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner (Red Skelton Quotes) I know my limit. I just keep passing out before I reach it (Red Skelton Quotes) Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations (Red Skelton Quotes) I’m nuts and I know it. But so long as I make ‘em laugh, they ain’t going to lock me up (Red Skelton Quotes) I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. ‘Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!’ she said. So I suggested the kitchen (Red Skelton Quotes) Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language-One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap (Red Skelton Quotes) Today’s comics use four-letter words as a shortcut to thinking. They’re shooting for that big laugh and it becomes a panic thing, using four-letter words to shock people (Red Skelton Quotes) I personally believe that each of us was put here for a purpose -- to build not to destroy. If I can make people smile, then I have served my purpose for God (Red Skelton Quotes) You know, last night it was so cold that my pillow and my sheets fought to see who got under the blankets first. (Red Skelton Quotes) If by chance some day you’re not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I’ve said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled. (Red Skelton Quotes) Bob Hope, Red Skelton, and Eddie Cantor... help us keep our balance (Red Skelton Quotes) There are three signs of old age: loss of memory... I forget the other two (Red Skelton Quotes) I don’t pick on politicians. They ain’t done nothin’ (Red Skelton Quotes) I get plenty of exercise carrying the coffins of my friends who exercise (Red Skelton Quotes) Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime (Red Skelton Quotes) God’s children and their happiness are my reasons for being (Red Skelton Quotes) If by chance some day you’re not feeling well and you should remember some silly thing I’ve said or done and it brings back a smile to your face or a chuckle to your heart, then my purpose as your clown has been fulfilled (Red Skelton Quotes) Congress: Bingo with billions (Red Skelton Quotes) I only come to life when there are people watching (Red Skelton Quotes) I left home because I was hungry (Red Skelton Quotes) I personally believe we were put here to build and not to destroy (Red Skelton Quotes) No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds (Red Skelton Quotes) Live by this credo: have a little laugh at life and look around you for happiness instead of sadness. Laughter has always brought me out of unhappy situations (Red Skelton Quotes) Our principles are the springs of our actions. Our actions, the springs of our happiness or misery. Too much care, therefore, cannot be taken in forming our principles (Red Skelton Quotes) Exercise? I get it on the golf course. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics (Red Skelton Quotes) You know how to tell when you’re getting old? When your broad mind changes places with your narrow waist (Red Skelton Quotes)

1 2