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John Hodgman Quotes

Elwyn Brooks White was a very Maine personality which is, I hate everyone and everyone stay away from me Picture Quote #1

Any time you try to create an Internet meme, automatic fail. That’s like the worst thing you can do Picture Quote #1

It would be rather naive to imagine that Oprah doesn’t have an Earth Evacuation Plan. You know Richard Branson does - his is in plain sight Picture Quote #1

My biggest superhero of writing is Jorge Luis Borges, the Argentine fabulist. He’s an amazingly perceptive writer, but also willing to make a joke Picture Quote #1

Here’s the thing: I am not only a creature of civilization, I’m an asthmatic person. I will only live so long as I have stockpiled the proper inhalers. I’m effectively a cyborg. You know how in Jurassic Park, they bred those dinosaurs with the lysine deficiencies, so if they ever got off the island, they’d die? That’s me Picture Quote #1

We estimate that there are perhaps 20,000 prehistoric hunter-gatherers frozen up in those glaciers. Now, if they simply thaw and wander around, it’s not a problem, but if they find a leader - a Captain Caveman, if you will - we’ll be facing an even more serious problem Picture Quote #1

Having you in my life made everything better

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Dogs teach us a lot of things but none more important than to love unconditionally

When I listen to music - I don’t particularly do it for fun all that much. It’s not a big part of my life, and I’m not really on top of what’s happening in the world of music in the way I was when I was a teenager Picture Quote #1

Publishers, editors, agents all have one thing in common, aside from their love of cocktail parties. It’s an incredible taste and an ability to find and nurture authors Picture Quote #1

I am not beautiful, so I don’t know why I’m making myself ugly. But the mustache stays Picture Quote #1

I used to enjoy the anonymity of being a literary figure and occasionally a public radio figure Picture Quote #1

As a live stand-up comedy performer, I have the benefit of choosing real entrance music Picture Quote #1

I suspect that when the truth ceases to be heartbreakingly funny, we will be in a better place and a happier society over all Picture Quote #1

The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why

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A year from now you'll wish you started today

I feel that there is a decision people make to either engage in a legitimately ridiculous process to get your kid into school, or choose not to engage in that so much, and end up finding a nice local school that fits Picture Quote #1

I think that obviously, there is a perverse attraction to a fundamentally changed world or the end of the world. There is a death wish, a perverse death wish. Not just for ourselves, not just for the movie ‘Death Wish,’ but for the end of all human life Picture Quote #1

My hope when I wrote the first book was that I would get to do it again. But it was not entirely clear that that would happen Picture Quote #1

Do not listen to the killjoys who tell you never to eat oysters in months that do not contain the letter R: May, June, July, August, Octoba. You know Picture Quote #1

I think in American culture, we put value on economic success but tell people you don’t have to be economically successful to be happy Picture Quote #1

So much of creativity is the feeling that you’re either getting a gift from some other dimension or some other part of yourself Picture Quote #1

I like me a little bit more when i'm with you

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The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary

I would say 70 percent of people who are in therapy are in therapy not because of their upbringing, not because of their mean sister or obsessions, but because of anxiety brought about by lack of financial security Picture Quote #1

Many people, many girls have tried to teach me the rules to football. And you would think that it would get in my head that way, but I just don’t understand it Picture Quote #1

I think for the foreseeable future, the truth is going to be awful and funny all at the same time Picture Quote #1

Just because you see an iceberg does not mean that there isn’t global warming Picture Quote #1

My memories of literary agenting are of a very happy time and there are surprising reminders of it coming back now Picture Quote #1

I made an impulse buy of a house in Maine to make my wife happy and now have gone back into debt and it’s all started over for me Picture Quote #1

Chocolate is the answer. Who cares what the question is

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When we first met, i had no idea you would be so important to me

I know nothing about letting go Picture Quote #1

There is no ritual that enhances creativity other than just starting Picture Quote #1

Specificity is the soul of narrative Picture Quote #1

First of all, I wish I could grow a beard Picture Quote #1

Everyone wants to write a book. Very few people are able to do it Picture Quote #1

The villain of any story is often the most compelling character Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Elwyn Brooks White was a very Maine personality which is, I hate everyone and everyone stay away from me. (John Hodgman Quotes) Any time you try to create an Internet meme, automatic fail. That’s like the worst thing you can do (John Hodgman Quotes) It would be rather naive to imagine that Oprah doesn’t have an Earth Evacuation Plan. You know Richard Branson does - his is in plain sight (John Hodgman Quotes) My biggest superhero of writing is Jorge Luis Borges, the Argentine fabulist. He’s an amazingly perceptive writer, but also willing to make a joke (John Hodgman Quotes) Here’s the thing: I am not only a creature of civilization, I’m an asthmatic person. I will only live so long as I have stockpiled the proper inhalers. I’m effectively a cyborg. You know how in Jurassic Park, they bred those dinosaurs with the lysine deficiencies, so if they ever got off the island, they’d die? That’s me (John Hodgman Quotes) We estimate that there are perhaps 20,000 prehistoric hunter-gatherers frozen up in those glaciers. Now, if they simply thaw and wander around, it’s not a problem, but if they find a leader - a Captain Caveman, if you will - we’ll be facing an even more serious problem (John Hodgman Quotes) When I listen to music - I don’t particularly do it for fun all that much. It’s not a big part of my life, and I’m not really on top of what’s happening in the world of music in the way I was when I was a teenager (John Hodgman Quotes) Publishers, editors, agents all have one thing in common, aside from their love of cocktail parties. It’s an incredible taste and an ability to find and nurture authors (John Hodgman Quotes) I am not beautiful, so I don’t know why I’m making myself ugly. But the mustache stays. (John Hodgman Quotes) I used to enjoy the anonymity of being a literary figure and occasionally a public radio figure (John Hodgman Quotes) As a live stand-up comedy performer, I have the benefit of choosing real entrance music (John Hodgman Quotes) I suspect that when the truth ceases to be heartbreakingly funny, we will be in a better place and a happier society over all. (John Hodgman Quotes) I feel that there is a decision people make to either engage in a legitimately ridiculous process to get your kid into school, or choose not to engage in that so much, and end up finding a nice local school that fits. (John Hodgman Quotes) I think that obviously, there is a perverse attraction to a fundamentally changed world or the end of the world. There is a death wish, a perverse death wish. Not just for ourselves, not just for the movie ‘Death Wish,’ but for the end of all human life. (John Hodgman Quotes) My hope when I wrote the first book was that I would get to do it again. But it was not entirely clear that that would happen. (John Hodgman Quotes) Do not listen to the killjoys who tell you never to eat oysters in months that do not contain the letter R: May, June, July, August, Octoba. You know. (John Hodgman Quotes) I think in American culture, we put value on economic success but tell people you don’t have to be economically successful to be happy. (John Hodgman Quotes) So much of creativity is the feeling that you’re either getting a gift from some other dimension or some other part of yourself. (John Hodgman Quotes) I would say 70 percent of people who are in therapy are in therapy not because of their upbringing, not because of their mean sister or obsessions, but because of anxiety brought about by lack of financial security. (John Hodgman Quotes) Many people, many girls have tried to teach me the rules to football. And you would think that it would get in my head that way, but I just don’t understand it. (John Hodgman Quotes) I think for the foreseeable future, the truth is going to be awful and funny all at the same time (John Hodgman Quotes) Just because you see an iceberg does not mean that there isn’t global warming (John Hodgman Quotes) My memories of literary agenting are of a very happy time and there are surprising reminders of it coming back now. (John Hodgman Quotes) I made an impulse buy of a house in Maine to make my wife happy and now have gone back into debt and it’s all started over for me. (John Hodgman Quotes) I know nothing about letting go (John Hodgman Quotes) There is no ritual that enhances creativity other than just starting (John Hodgman Quotes) Specificity is the soul of narrative (John Hodgman Quotes) First of all, I wish I could grow a beard (John Hodgman Quotes) Everyone wants to write a book. Very few people are able to do it (John Hodgman Quotes) The villain of any story is often the most compelling character (John Hodgman Quotes)

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