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Jo Brand Quotes
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Friendship Quotes
Love Quotes
Life Quotes
Funny Quotes
Motivational Quotes
Inspirational Quotes
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Text Quotes
We women continue to swallow this line that it’s unladylike or even proof of being a lesbian if you wear flat shoes like Doc Martens. I’m prepared to put up with that accusation, because at least my feet aren’t killing me and I don’t look like a bandy ostrich (Jo Brand Quotes)
I have seen good nurses and bad nurses. They existed along a continuum: from hard-working, kind and competent people, to office-hugging, bone-idle types, to apathetic, disengaged automatons (Jo Brand Quotes)
I love doing stand-up. It’s so self-contained - you go there, you do it, you go home - but with telly, there are too many people involved with it with opinions. You have a product, and everyone wants to change it (Jo Brand Quotes)
I swam at school a lot. Long-distance swimming in pools, and diving, then when we moved to Hastings when I was 13 I used to swim in the sea all the time; I loved it out of season and when it was rough (Jo Brand Quotes)
I thought I was funny as a kid. I used to play tricks on my brothers - I’d tie a two-shilling piece to a bit of cotton, then pull it away as they went to grab it (Jo Brand Quotes)
I used to do bell ringing in Benenden church. It was really good fun, actually. My best friend’s dad was the local vicar, and so it was expected as her best friend that I would go to church every Sunday with her (Jo Brand Quotes)
I’ve always been criticised for how filthy my material is. Victoria Wood said to me once, ‘I wish I was a bit ruder, like you,’ and I said, ‘Well, I wish I was a bit cleaner, like you.’ (Jo Brand Quotes)
If you’re a fat person - and especially if you’re a woman - at all stages of your life you’ll get abuse for it, so you have to work out a way of dealing with it. The best way is to be humorous about it - that defuses any tension (Jo Brand Quotes)
My father was an engineer and my mother was a social worker, and they met as young socialists. That probably tells you everything you need to know about my attitude to money - I’ve never really been bothered about it (Jo Brand Quotes)
My mum and my husband are from Irish backgrounds, so we have a lot of potatoes. Chips, mashed, boiled, new potatoes, I love them all. Even the slightly wonky ones like Duchess potatoes that go up in a little spiral (Jo Brand Quotes)
My mum is bright, ambitious, well read, political and very bolshie: when my dad was conscripted into the Army and posted to Libya, she convinced some general to let her go with him. I don’t know how she managed it (Jo Brand Quotes)
One thing lots of Christians do have in common is that they can’t help coming across as smug. This winds lots of people up, particularly because famous Christians pronounce on the life of the poor from their very lovely affluent homes filled with their very lovely families and attractive pets (Jo Brand Quotes)
Some men are deeply likable but have attitudes I don’t like. Does that mean I should completely dismiss them? It’s like saying: if someone votes Tory can you like them? And, yes, I can. I have friends who vote Tory, and I’m appalled, but that’s not to say they’re not great people in so many other ways. We have a tendency to oversimplify things (Jo Brand Quotes)
When I got married, the Sun ran the headline: ‘Here comes the bride, all fat and wide.’ Luckily, it was a few days after the wedding - but it was still hideous to read at a great romantic moment (Jo Brand Quotes)
With proper acting, I don’t know what I would play - I got sent a script for a play, and it said in the notes that my proposed character was ‘hideously fat and ugly’. That made my day. I mean, I do know I am no oil painting (Jo Brand Quotes)
You don’t really see ugly people that are old, or a bit grotty and smelly, in the media. If a Martian came down, they would think we were all tall, thin, attractive and wealthy (Jo Brand Quotes)
People are so different in reality from the picture created of them on TV. So it’s all a creation; everything is made up (Jo Brand Quotes)
I think there’s a danger that we’re moving towards a state where the people we are expected to admire are almost not human anymore, and I don’t like that. I prefer it when someone looks like a nice person, and you think, ‘I could have a laugh with them in the pub.’ (Jo Brand Quotes)
Over the years I attempted to make my style a bit more relaxed ‘cause the initial style you couldn’t watch for more than ten minutes without wanting to kill me. (Jo Brand Quotes)
I can honestly say I’ve never sold any arms to a repressive foreign regime while reassuring everyone at home that the weapons will be used for nice things. (Jo Brand Quotes)
I’ve never, ever had people being aggressive to me in public or abusing me, and actually quite a lot of men do say to me, ‘You’re quite good’ - though they can’t bear to go, ‘You’re great.’ (Jo Brand Quotes)
They say revenge is a dish best eaten cold, but for most people, by the time it’s ready to eat, they just don’t fancy it any more. (Jo Brand Quotes)
People say you should read your criticism because it will make you a better person but it doesn’t. It just makes you a sad bitter old showbiz nightmare. (Jo Brand Quotes)
I took my husband to the hospital yesterday to have 17 stitches out - that’ll teach him to buy me a sewing kit for my birthday. (Jo Brand Quotes)
It’s actually very hard when you’re settled in one place to completely uproot yourself and go. (Jo Brand Quotes)
As a comic and as a nurse, it’s important to look calm on the surface when you’re absolutely crapping yourself inside. So, if someone is waving a machete at you, which has happened to me when I was a nurse, it’s important to make that person feel that you’re in control. (Jo Brand Quotes)
I made a supreme effort not to do that thing that parents do, which is to bore people without children to death by going on and on about how funny their children are, so there’s none of that hopefully. (Jo Brand Quotes)
The thing I thought about doing it was it’s Comic Relief and you’ve got to be funny. So although I did try to sing properly it obviously has hilarious results when you can’t sing. (Jo Brand Quotes)
It wasn’t a conscious effort to have kids later. It was just the way life goes. (Jo Brand Quotes)
I love everything about books. I love the content, the way they look and even the lovely way they smell. I think a book collection says something about you as a person, and certainly my books are something I’d want to pass on for future generations. (Jo Brand Quotes)