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Jay London Quotes

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I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I’m watching the highlights  (Jay London Quotes) It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes  (Jay London Quotes) A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked  (Jay London Quotes) My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality  (Jay London Quotes) I model irregular clothing  (Jay London Quotes) I went out with a promiscuous impressionist. She did everybody  (Jay London Quotes) My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings  (Jay London Quotes) I was born nine months premature  (Jay London Quotes) I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else  (Jay London Quotes) Does anybody know what I’m doing up here?  (Jay London Quotes) Do you know it was a year a ago today?  (Jay London Quotes) You know what burns me? Matches  (Jay London Quotes) After all these years I had the privilege of naming my private part, cause we have nicknames. So I named my private part pride... it’s not much but at least I have my pride.  (Jay London Quotes) I went to a record store and asked for 50 cent. They kicked me out for pan-handling.  (Jay London Quotes) I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don’t worry it’s not the end of the world.  (Jay London Quotes) I’m on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness  (Jay London Quotes) I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road  (Jay London Quotes) I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm  (Jay London Quotes) Did you know that today will never be tomorrow  (Jay London Quotes) A window of opportunity for me usually involves a rock  (Jay London Quotes) My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings  (Jay London Quotes) My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless  (Jay London Quotes) I went to an audition the other day, they were casting 13 people to be clouds, 14 people showed up, it was overcast  (Jay London Quotes) I wanted to take up music, so my father bought me a blunt instrument. He told me to knock myself out  (Jay London Quotes) His puppyhood was a period of foolish rebellion. He was always worsted, but he fought back because it was his nature to fight back. And he was unconquerable  (Jay London Quotes) They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I’m more concerned about the adults  (Jay London Quotes) My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can’t say cheese  (Jay London Quotes) I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger  (Jay London Quotes) I was going to buy a book on hair loss, but the pages kept falling out  (Jay London Quotes) I told my therapist I was having nightmares about nuclear explosions. He said don’t worry it’s not the end of the world  (Jay London Quotes)
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