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Groucho Marx Quotes

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Humor is reason gone mad  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Alimony is like buying hay for a dead horse  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I remember the first time I had sex - I kept the receipt  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I worked my way up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana  (Groucho Marx Quotes) One of the best hearing aids a man can have is an attentive wife  (Groucho Marx Quotes) If you are not having fun you are doing something wrong  (Groucho Marx Quotes) You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters  (Groucho Marx Quotes) No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend  (Groucho Marx Quotes) You are going Uruguay, and I’m going my way  (Groucho Marx Quotes) It’s hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I’ve been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I must confess, I was born at a very early age  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Growing old is something you do if you’re lucky  (Groucho Marx Quotes) She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I must confess, I was born at a very early age  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Before I speak, I have something important to say  (Groucho Marx Quotes) A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke  (Groucho Marx Quotes) A man’s only as old as the woman he feels  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Either he’s dead or my watch has stopped  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Go, and never darken my towels again  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Room service? Send up a larger room  (Groucho Marx Quotes) If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I intend to live forever, or die trying  (Groucho Marx Quotes) I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it  (Groucho Marx Quotes) Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy  (Groucho Marx Quotes)
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