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Funny Parenting Quotes

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure
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What a beautiful world it would be if people had hearts like dogs
I told you I'll be ready in FIVE minutes, stop calling me every half hour
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When I first saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew
Together is my favorite place to be
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A girl doesn't need anyone who doesn't need her
The darkest nights produce the brightest stars
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Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results
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Text Quotes
I leave my husband with the baby for ten minutes  (Funny Parenting Quotes) I'm sorry dear, but I like the puppy better  (Funny Parenting Quotes) People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one  (Funny Parenting Quotes) None of this would have happened if we weren't so rich. Let me get this straight, okay? Your mother and I are rich. You have nothing  (Funny Parenting Quotes) What I see. What dad sees  (Funny Parenting Quotes) 1st kid's room. 2nd kid's room  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Wife is out... so do I feed this thing or what?  (Funny Parenting Quotes) I know a first time parent when I see one  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Don't look at me, he's your son  (Funny Parenting Quotes) The "first time mom" look  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Dad, will you put my hair in a bun?  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Left my husband alone for 1 hour and this happened  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Dad level: 3000  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Every parent’s question when sleeping with kids... “How can someone so small take up so much room?!”  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Parents are often faced with crucial decisions - grab a child before he falls or grab a camera before he falls  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Sometimes, you just need to put that baby on the floor and get yourself a slurpee  (Funny Parenting Quotes) My wife and I have five children. And the reason why we have five children is because we Do Not...Want...Six  (Funny Parenting Quotes) A lot of parents pack up their troubles and send them off to summer camp  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Any kid will run any errand for you if you ask at bedtime  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Insanity is hereditary - you get it from your kids  (Funny Parenting Quotes) The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents  (Funny Parenting Quotes) The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent  (Funny Parenting Quotes) I’ve lost my mind and I’m pretty sure the kids took it  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Few things are more satisfying than seeing your children have teenagers of their own  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help you reach it faster, too  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Anyone who thinks the art of conversation is dead ought to tell a child to go to bed  (Funny Parenting Quotes) Kids have so much energy because they siphon it out of their parents like midget gasoline thieves  (Funny Parenting Quotes) A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it  (Funny Parenting Quotes)
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