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Dennis Miller Quotes

Hey, what if those crop circles are just ads for Target? Picture Quote #1

I don’t need to be born again. I got it right the first time Picture Quote #1

But the biggest fake of the year, Paul Begala’s last smile Picture Quote #1

It’s nice to be included in the broadcast food chain Picture Quote #1

You’ve got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven Picture Quote #1

Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese Picture Quote #1

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I’m like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess Picture Quote #1

I rant, therefore I am Picture Quote #1

Elected office holds more perks than Elvis’ nightstand Picture Quote #1

How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides? Picture Quote #1

Pat Buchanan is so homo-phobic, he blames global warming on the AIDS quilt Picture Quote #1

Born again?! No, I’m not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time Picture Quote #1

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If Bill Gates is worth $30 billion then a good haircut must cost $31 billion Picture Quote #1

Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living Picture Quote #1

I’d rather be funny than wise Picture Quote #1

Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong Picture Quote #1

Sometimes you just have the thin the herd Picture Quote #1

I don’t have credibility, I’m a comedian Picture Quote #1

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Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live Picture Quote #1

The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country Picture Quote #1

Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled! Picture Quote #1

I lapsed into rude Picture Quote #1

The funny thing is, Dennis Miller got me back into comedy Picture Quote #1

Two wrongs may not make a right, but a thousand wrongs make a writer Picture Quote #1

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At one time, washington actually meant something. But now, it's about as relevant as Bob Dylan's tuning fork Picture Quote #1

If I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago Picture Quote #1

After 7 years of marriage, I am sure of 2 things: First, never wallpaper together and second, you’ll need 2 bathrooms... both for her. The rest is a mystery, but a mystery I love to be involved in Picture Quote #1

There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can’t identify the victim Picture Quote #1

Why is electricity so expensive these days? Why does it cost so much for something I can make with a balloon and my hair? Picture Quote #1

The first half dozen or so will be nice, but after that, I'm going to want a pro Picture Quote #1

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

Hey, what if those crop circles are just ads for Target? (Dennis Miller Quotes) I don’t need to be born again. I got it right the first time. (Dennis Miller Quotes) But the biggest fake of the year, Paul Begala’s last smile (Dennis Miller Quotes) It’s nice to be included in the broadcast food chain (Dennis Miller Quotes) You’ve got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven (Dennis Miller Quotes) Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese (Dennis Miller Quotes) I’m like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess (Dennis Miller Quotes) I rant, therefore I am (Dennis Miller Quotes) Elected office holds more perks than Elvis’ nightstand (Dennis Miller Quotes) How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides? (Dennis Miller Quotes) Pat Buchanan is so homo-phobic, he blames global warming on the AIDS quilt (Dennis Miller Quotes) Born again?! No, I’m not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time. (Dennis Miller Quotes) If Bill Gates is worth $30 billion then a good haircut must cost $31 billion (Dennis Miller Quotes) Everybody has to sell out at some point to make a living (Dennis Miller Quotes) I’d rather be funny than wise (Dennis Miller Quotes) Of course, that’s just my opinion. I could be wrong (Dennis Miller Quotes) Sometimes you just have the thin the herd (Dennis Miller Quotes) I don’t have credibility, I’m a comedian (Dennis Miller Quotes) Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live (Dennis Miller Quotes) The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country (Dennis Miller Quotes) Twitter! Never have lives been less lived and more chronicled! (Dennis Miller Quotes) I lapsed into rude (Dennis Miller Quotes) The funny thing is, Dennis Miller got me back into comedy (Dennis Miller Quotes) Two wrongs may not make a right, but a thousand wrongs make a writer (Dennis Miller Quotes) At one time, washington actually meant something. But now, it's about as relevant as Bob Dylan's tuning fork (Dennis Miller Quotes) If I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago (Dennis Miller Quotes) After 7 years of marriage, I am sure of 2 things: First, never wallpaper together and second, you’ll need 2 bathrooms... both for her. The rest is a mystery, but a mystery I love to be involved in (Dennis Miller Quotes) There is a chalk outline slowly being drawn around common sense and most people can’t identify the victim (Dennis Miller Quotes) Why is electricity so expensive these days? Why does it cost so much for something I can make with a balloon and my hair? (Dennis Miller Quotes) The first half dozen or so will be nice, but after that, I'm going to want a pro (Dennis Miller Quotes)