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Dana Gould Quotes

I’m the Forrest Gump of comedy Picture Quote #1

I’m no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes Picture Quote #1

Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there’s anxiety Picture Quote #1

When I found out that coffins are padded, I stopped fearing death Picture Quote #1

The older I get, the more I look like my favorite shoes Picture Quote #1

I try to look on the bright side, but it really hurts my eyes Picture Quote #1

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I can’t wait for the day I learn to live in the now! Picture Quote #1

Did you know that Dog Heaven and Cat Hell were the same place? Picture Quote #1

Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes Picture Quote #1

Death’s vigilance is eternal, so shall mine be Picture Quote #1

I don’t really like myself, but I’m way into me, physically Picture Quote #1

In an effort to look cool, I am going to stop shouting Hey, you! at airplanes Picture Quote #1

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I try to live in the moment, but by the time I get there it’s too late Picture Quote #1

The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family Picture Quote #1

The best part of chronic head lice is it takes away your fear of dying alone Picture Quote #1

My dogs love me. Of course, by love I mean poop and by me I mean everywhere Picture Quote #1

Having kids means there’s always someone around to blame your fart on Picture Quote #1

There’s a big difference between poll workers and pole workers. Sadly Picture Quote #1

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Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off Picture Quote #1

Being funny is not the same as being happy Picture Quote #1

Life imitates art but art intimidates life Picture Quote #1

Competition is the death of art Picture Quote #1

Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I’m the Forrest Gump of comedy (Dana Gould Quotes) I’m no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes (Dana Gould Quotes) Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there’s anxiety (Dana Gould Quotes) When I found out that coffins are padded, I stopped fearing death (Dana Gould Quotes) The older I get, the more I look like my favorite shoes (Dana Gould Quotes) I try to look on the bright side, but it really hurts my eyes (Dana Gould Quotes) I can’t wait for the day I learn to live in the now! (Dana Gould Quotes) Did you know that Dog Heaven and Cat Hell were the same place? (Dana Gould Quotes) Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes. (Dana Gould Quotes) Death’s vigilance is eternal, so shall mine be (Dana Gould Quotes) I don’t really like myself, but I’m way into me, physically (Dana Gould Quotes) In an effort to look cool, I am going to stop shouting Hey, you! at airplanes. (Dana Gould Quotes) I try to live in the moment, but by the time I get there it’s too late (Dana Gould Quotes) The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family (Dana Gould Quotes) The best part of chronic head lice is it takes away your fear of dying alone (Dana Gould Quotes) My dogs love me. Of course, by love I mean poop and by me I mean everywhere. (Dana Gould Quotes) Having kids means there’s always someone around to blame your fart on (Dana Gould Quotes) There’s a big difference between poll workers and pole workers. Sadly. (Dana Gould Quotes) Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off (Dana Gould Quotes) Being funny is not the same as being happy (Dana Gould Quotes) Life imitates art but art intimidates life (Dana Gould Quotes) Competition is the death of art (Dana Gould Quotes)