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University Student Quotes

Craig Kilborn Quotes

Dogs teach us a lot of things but none more important than to love unconditionally - Dog Quotes
The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why - Mark Twain Quotes
A year from now you'll wish you started today - Work Quotes
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken - Oscar Wilde Quotes
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However, frat-boy humor is funny and it always will be  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) However, frat - boy humor is funny and it always will be  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I’m going to miss my best friends - my cameras  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Comedy doesn’t always have to come from a dark place  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I don’t complain  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Hillary Clinton’s 506-page memoir has come out. So much of her personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep with an intern  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) As the Democrats get revved up at their convention in Boston, President Bush is fighting back the only way he knows how: by going on vacation! Ah, it’s nice to take a rest, replenish your supply of smirks. The vacation was expected, because Bush traditionally takes a month off every summer to relax and avoid reading National Security Warnings  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Federal authorities have informed Martha Stewart’s lawyers she will be indicted for her role in the ImClone insider trading scandal. Good news for Martha - stripes are back in this year  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Today Homeland Security Chief Tom Ridge lowered the terror alert from orange to yellow. Does anybody need 16 miles of duct tape?  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) There has been no electricity in Baghdad for a week and the people are angry. You would be angry too if you couldn’t watch your brand new stolen TV  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Larry Flynt, running for governor of California. His goal - change our state bird to the spread eagle  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Here in California, one candidate for governor is a 100-year-old woman. She’s going door-to-door and asking one simple question - ‘Do I live here?’  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Howard Dean is narrowing the field of potential running mates. It’s down to Mike Tyson or Bobby Knight  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Today, John Kerry announced a fool-proof plan to wipe out the $500B deficit. John Kerry has a plan, he’s going to put it on his wife’s Gold Card  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) This is so weird. I saw the new John Kerry campaign commercial and he says, ‘I’m John Kerry and I approve of this message - if I have one.’  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) John Kerry will be the Democratic nominee for president. Democrats finally found someone who is Al Gore without the flash and the sizzle  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) With Iraq plunging into chaos and gas prices at record highs President Bush took time out this weekend for a ride on his bicycle, but unfortunately he fell off and sustained cuts to his face and hands. Apparently Bush was distracted by the enormous responsibilities of the presidency. I’m just kidding. He hit some gravel or something  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) George W. Bush even stopped in Pennsylvania to try his hand at the lotto and gave up when he could only think of the numbers 4 and 17  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I enjoyed retirement the right way... linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) I learned at an early age that using the third person will push some buttons  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Clinton said he feels safe in Harlem. It’s the only place in the state Hillary is scared to look for him after dark.  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn’t answer the phone.  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) President Bush is not fazed by other candidates’ war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) President Bush is in the hot seat over Iraqi pre-war intelligence. Remember the good ol’ days when the only thing the president was trying to cover up was a stain?  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) As John Kerry sails toward the Democratic nomination, new questions are emerging about President Bush’s service in the National Guard, like where he was for six months in 1972 and why he refused to take a routine physical. President Bush has vowed to get to the bottom of this right after Election Day  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) In a new poll 54 percent believed President Bush exaggerated the size of Iraq’s missile threat. Hey, he’s a guy  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) In Louisiana, President Bush met with over 15,000 National Guard troops. Here’s the weird part, nobody remembers seeing him there  (Craig Kilborn Quotes) John Kerry will undergo surgery to repair his right shoulder. He originally hurt it when he suddenly switched positions on Iraq  (Craig Kilborn Quotes)
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