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Adam Carolla Quotes

I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody Picture Quote #1

I don’t know anything about computers Picture Quote #1

Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name? Picture Quote #1

I get depressed at airports Picture Quote #1

I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick Picture Quote #1

Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays Picture Quote #1

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Figure out what to do, then take a nap Picture Quote #1

You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave Picture Quote #1

When you’re picking a basketball team, you’ll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you’re playing the odds Picture Quote #1

That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever? Picture Quote #1

The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks Picture Quote #1

If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here’s what you know: you know when you’re getting laid, and you know when it’s all over. Those are the only two things you’re aware of Picture Quote #1

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I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make Picture Quote #1

When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell Picture Quote #1

If you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course... Real estate values go ‘boom!’ Picture Quote #1

I don’t think I’ve ever seen pie advertised. That’s how you know it’s good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial Picture Quote #1

I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time Picture Quote #1

I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary Picture Quote #1

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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader Picture Quote #1

The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing Picture Quote #1

When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that Picture Quote #1

The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were Picture Quote #1

I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around Picture Quote #1

I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much Picture Quote #1

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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself Picture Quote #1

I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings Picture Quote #1

The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing Picture Quote #1

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Friendship Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Quotes

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Text Quotes

I don’t have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody (Adam Carolla Quotes) I don’t know anything about computers (Adam Carolla Quotes) Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name? (Adam Carolla Quotes) I get depressed at airports (Adam Carolla Quotes) I’ve got a great eye for color. I’m like a chick (Adam Carolla Quotes) Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays (Adam Carolla Quotes) Figure out what to do, then take a nap (Adam Carolla Quotes) You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave (Adam Carolla Quotes) When you’re picking a basketball team, you’ll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you’re playing the odds (Adam Carolla Quotes) That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone... forever? (Adam Carolla Quotes) The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks (Adam Carolla Quotes) If you’re a guy, you have absolutely no idea what’s going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here’s what you know: you know when you’re getting laid, and you know when it’s all over. Those are the only two things you’re aware of (Adam Carolla Quotes) I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make (Adam Carolla Quotes) When I fart my ass makes a trumpet sound that heralds the arrival of the smell (Adam Carolla Quotes) If you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course... Real estate values go ‘boom!’ (Adam Carolla Quotes) I don’t think I’ve ever seen pie advertised. That’s how you know it’s good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial (Adam Carolla Quotes) I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time (Adam Carolla Quotes) I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary (Adam Carolla Quotes) No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader (Adam Carolla Quotes) The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don’t have a compelling host then you have nothing (Adam Carolla Quotes) When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that (Adam Carolla Quotes) The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were (Adam Carolla Quotes) I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around (Adam Carolla Quotes) I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much (Adam Carolla Quotes) You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself (Adam Carolla Quotes) I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings (Adam Carolla Quotes) The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing (Adam Carolla Quotes)

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